I remember just standing there in the yard bawling my eyes out as I watched my husband drive away with her. I was completely alone, besides the screaming newborn in my arms, and I didn’t know how I was going to manage. There are few times that I ever felt as devastated as that moment. What had I done?

It all started a few days before. I couldn’t wait to get out of the hospital and convinced my doctor to release me a few days early. Once Ty and I arrived home I was relieved and exhausted. Breastfeeding was NOT going well and Ty was hungry and cranky. My mom would not be arriving for another day and I really needed her.

The first night home, Ty cried all night long. He wouldn’t stop. I cried right along with him. I needed sleep and he just wanted to eat. eat. eat. It was then that I first started to wonder what I had done. I doubted myself and had serious thoughts about whether I could pull off this parenting thing. I even had visions of just throwing that small screaming mass of life right out the door and going back to sleep.

My mom arrived the next day, helped me get through some rough breastfeeding issues, rocked the baby all night so I could sleep and got me on the right track. The moment my husband took her to the airport to go back home, I became even more afraid. I felt very alone.

I didn’t have postpartum depression, but had some scary thoughts and nights. I eventually pulled out of my funk and forced myself to go out and be a part of the world. At the time I was going through all of this, it never even crossed my mind that any of my emotions could be related to any kind of depression, even though I have a history of that disease.

When I think about mothers who do suffer with postpartum depression, my heart really goes out to them. I had just a small glimpse into that sinking dark world and still can’t imagine the pain that others go through who actually have postpartum depression. In my experience, nothing can prepare you for motherhood, never mind a dealing with a serious disorder at the same time.

What gets me, is the fact that I didn’t get any information on postpartum from any of the classes I went to for pregnancy. I went to a parenting class. Nothing. I did learn how to swaddle the heck out of a doll, though. Breastfeeding? Nothing. I got about 500 coupons and pamphlets from the hospital on breastfeeding, formula, diapers and putting the baby on their back to sleep. (I still have the exact stack of papers!) Not one single thing on postpartum. Why is that?

Isn’t having the signs and maybe a little info on postpartum more important than saving $1.00 off on Pampers? I even had a breast feeding hotline to call. Who was I supposed to call though, when I felt like throwing my baby out the door? I think maybe the health industry needs to step up the awareness of postpartum a little more. At least in my personal experience.

And then. Then there is the other side. I am sure most of you remember the Today Show Tom Cruise incident. I am all for people having their own opinions and beliefs. Heck, I have my own I don’t even mind when they act on them and involve their families. I do! What I do mind is when they are condescending and out right rude to the people who do suffer.

I don’t care if you believe postpartum is real or not. There are women suffering and we should be trying to be supportive and do whatever we can to help that family at the moment. This disease does affect the entire family and as we know from the news, bad things can happen if this goes untreated.

I guess I would like to see a more awareness, attention, and acceptance of this disease. Talking about it should be as routine as breast/bottle and working/stay at home debates. There is so much hoopla over those and so much energy, why not send half of that in the direction of something really important, like this?

The blogosphere is a great support resource. This is the reason I am thankful for BlogHer’s Act: Blog Day for the Mother’s Act. The more we talk, compare notes and demand better, the closer we become to reining in this problem.

There is a bill in the Senate right now, that will provide education for postpartum and require health professionals to screen for this disorder. This is our time to ACT. Please take a moment to call your senator and let them know how important the Mother’s Act is to our families and nation.

Then? The power of the pen keyboard. Blog about it. Spread the word…

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